Borderline Girl Song Week One: APC “The Outsider”

May 13, 2012

So, just one more for today. I’ve been working (trying to at least) on this invitation card design all day. It’s for a non-profit I’ve volunteered for in the past. I’d promised to get it in last Monday but because of my little incident, I couldn’t . There goes the flakiness I was talking about.

Anyway, I AM getting it done now. How’s that for cognitive and behavioral restructuring?

The title of the invitation is:

“Down With Wage Theft FIESTA!”

Pretty cool, huh? Yeah, I figure if I’m doing things like this, I’m still maintaining. I’ve gotten a referral for group (DBT) therapy because I requested it, and I’m waiting on that now… Haven’t heard back from the psychiatrist though and probably won’t considering what the receptionist told me. Blegh. “You have to go to the ER. We don’t handle emergencies.”

And my mind has been racing all over the place. And family got together, just my little family of four, but when we get together we sound like ten. So I’m super hyped still and in my hyped state I wrote a WHOLE BUNCH of posts that have become a little series now. heehee

I’m titling this series, “Borderline Girl Songs” because these are songs that have always reminded me of my mental struggles and kept me company in some way or another.

Now I know I shouldn’t be listening or reading anything triggering right now (oops already did accidentally). However, even though this first song I selected, “The Outsider,” by A Perfect Circle may be an angry song, it’s actually a song that has often  motivated me not to commit suicide, or so I think.

Oh, Maynard you can make me swoon by listening to your crooning and/or your yelling voice all day.


*I suppose to or should I add a trigger warning here?*

7 Responses to “Borderline Girl Song Week One: APC “The Outsider””

    • PAZ said

      I’m on the edge really. But I am maintaining Zen. 🙂

      Brother took me to a parade yesterday and I had a blast, then started bawling in the car. Tried to keep my weeping quiet so’s not to worry or make his friend uncomfortable… :-/
      But yes, I’m back. I’m stickin with it. Stickin to my guns… I’ve been wanting to get that book. “The Buddha and the Borderline”.

      Thanks for your support and positive feedback Zen. Oh and I went out and took pictures of the dogs today. BEAUTIFUL day. Sat on the grass until the bugs bit my legs all over.


  1. Jaen Wirefly said

    It’s definitively an anti-suicide song – and a good one. Thanks for posting.

    • PAZ said

      Thanks Jaen. That album, and THAT song in particular, really helped me through a rough time several years ago, so now that I had my freak-out/incident deal, I went back to it. Thirteenth Step, their second album, is also really good. It’s title was an allusion to the Twelve Step program of AA, though Maynard isn’t really “fond” of AA’s references to certain things.

      Tool’s Parabola was another one of those songs I could say “saved me” in a cliche fashion back when I was 16, but that’s more of a spiritual song for me. heheh. Glad you liked it.

  2. the howler and me said

    I have forgotten how much I love Tool and Perfect Circle. ~swoon~

    • PAZ said

      Let’s swoon together! Two of my favorite bands there. Tool more so than APC though APC’s Thirteenth Step and Mer De Noms has become a classic for me.

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